THE 10 WORST MOVIES OF 2015
The time has come once again where I run through both the best and worst films of the year. 2015 has seen a number of high quality films however, like every other year, there have also been a number of films that really should have never seen the light of day.
Before I share with you my worst films of the year, here are some honourable mentions that luckily escaped the list:
Taken 3
Into the Woods
Get Hard
Hot Tub Time Machine 2
Poltergeist
Hitman: Agent 47
Terminator: Genisys (lucky)
Fantastic Four (even luckier)
And now, the fun begins...
10) Knock Knock
I laughed my ass off however, unfortunately for all the wrong reasons. Eli Roth's thriller comes across as more of a parody, and not a very good one at that. Keanu Reeves is the man who lets two women take shelter from a storm in his house but little does he know the trouble that will follow. Reeves dials it up to eleven and delivers a both hilarious and embarrassing performance, the funny thing being that it still might not actually be the worst of his career. To this day, I am shocked that it actually took three people to write this shit.
9) Jupiter Ascending
The Wachowski siblings were back in 2015 with Jupiter Ascending, a sci-fi film that makes you question whether these were the same people that made The Matrix. It's over-the-top, tacky and quite literally, a total mess from start to finish. What makes it worse are the performances from not only Channing Tatum and Mila Kunis but Academy Award winning actor Eddie Redmayne as well, hamming it up and delivering his best Mr Burns impression.
8) Seventh Son
What's worse than one Academy Award winning actor hamming it up in a terrible film? The answer is two Academy Award winners doing exactly the same thing. I'm sure both Jeff Bridges and Julianne Moore will look back on Seventh Son in embarrassment, as anyone should, with the former being told to deliver his best Gandalf impersonation and the latter given permission to chew the scenery and shit it all out... everywhere. The performances are bad enough however, combine them with some childish writing and ghastly special effects, it becomes really hard to stomach.
7) Pan
You'd think it would be easy to make a film about Peter Pan. Not from this evidence. Things go downhill very quickly in Joe Wright's prequel to the classic tale we all know and love. I thought the rendition of Smells Like Teen Spirit would be the worst part yet it ends up being the least of this film's worries. The casting and story were the biggest problems, making Pan a convoluted mess that mistreats its characters as much as its audience. It's clear to see why Pan bombed majorly at the box-office.
6) The Cobbler
The first appearance from Adam Sandler on this year's list comes in the form of The Cobbler, a film that follows the trait of literally every single Adam Sandler film. It's lazily written, barely funny and the kind of film I wish would just go away. It won't though which is a real shame.
5) Fifty Shades of Grey
An adaptation of the best-selling novel that came from Twilight fan fiction was inevitable. By all accounts, the books are badly written and so is the film. It became almost unbearable to sit through the whole of this films but I'm glad I did as I got to hear some of the worst dialogue from any film in the past decade. Garbage.
4) Pixels
I actually like the concept of the idea for this film however, it's such a shame they let Adam Sandler anywhere near this project. One of the running jokes throughout is that Kevin James' President of the United States can't actually read. We were expected to laugh yet nobody did. Ugh.
3) Unfinished Business
Just look at the poster above. There is nothing that will make you want to watch this film and believe me, having seen Unfinished Business, it's well worth avoiding. None of the scenes feel like they should follow the other and some sensitive subjects, such as bullying, are sidelined for crude jokes, all of which leave a lot to be desired.
2) Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2
I hate it when unfunny comedies get sequels. I hate it more when the sequel is actually less funny than the first film. That's the case with Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2, a film that I hate with a passion. It's bad enough that the base of all the jokes come from the fact that Paul Blart is fat but to let Kevin James play the lead is just a cardinal sin. When is someone of importance going to tell this man that he is just not funny?
1) The Ridiculous 6
Now, I went into The Ridiculous 6 with low expectations. Two hours later that really felt more like three, those low expectations were well and truly met. The first film of Adam Sandler's four film deal with Netflix really doesn't even try to be anything but a load of offensive jokes told by Sandler and his motley crew of unfunny friends who really do steal a living as comedic actors. Go on Netflix, do the right thing and tear up that contract!
Before I share with you my worst films of the year, here are some honourable mentions that luckily escaped the list:
Taken 3
Into the Woods
Get Hard
Hot Tub Time Machine 2
Poltergeist
Hitman: Agent 47
Terminator: Genisys (lucky)
Fantastic Four (even luckier)
And now, the fun begins...
10) Knock Knock
I laughed my ass off however, unfortunately for all the wrong reasons. Eli Roth's thriller comes across as more of a parody, and not a very good one at that. Keanu Reeves is the man who lets two women take shelter from a storm in his house but little does he know the trouble that will follow. Reeves dials it up to eleven and delivers a both hilarious and embarrassing performance, the funny thing being that it still might not actually be the worst of his career. To this day, I am shocked that it actually took three people to write this shit.
9) Jupiter Ascending
The Wachowski siblings were back in 2015 with Jupiter Ascending, a sci-fi film that makes you question whether these were the same people that made The Matrix. It's over-the-top, tacky and quite literally, a total mess from start to finish. What makes it worse are the performances from not only Channing Tatum and Mila Kunis but Academy Award winning actor Eddie Redmayne as well, hamming it up and delivering his best Mr Burns impression.
8) Seventh Son
What's worse than one Academy Award winning actor hamming it up in a terrible film? The answer is two Academy Award winners doing exactly the same thing. I'm sure both Jeff Bridges and Julianne Moore will look back on Seventh Son in embarrassment, as anyone should, with the former being told to deliver his best Gandalf impersonation and the latter given permission to chew the scenery and shit it all out... everywhere. The performances are bad enough however, combine them with some childish writing and ghastly special effects, it becomes really hard to stomach.
7) Pan
You'd think it would be easy to make a film about Peter Pan. Not from this evidence. Things go downhill very quickly in Joe Wright's prequel to the classic tale we all know and love. I thought the rendition of Smells Like Teen Spirit would be the worst part yet it ends up being the least of this film's worries. The casting and story were the biggest problems, making Pan a convoluted mess that mistreats its characters as much as its audience. It's clear to see why Pan bombed majorly at the box-office.
6) The Cobbler
The first appearance from Adam Sandler on this year's list comes in the form of The Cobbler, a film that follows the trait of literally every single Adam Sandler film. It's lazily written, barely funny and the kind of film I wish would just go away. It won't though which is a real shame.
5) Fifty Shades of Grey
An adaptation of the best-selling novel that came from Twilight fan fiction was inevitable. By all accounts, the books are badly written and so is the film. It became almost unbearable to sit through the whole of this films but I'm glad I did as I got to hear some of the worst dialogue from any film in the past decade. Garbage.
4) Pixels
I actually like the concept of the idea for this film however, it's such a shame they let Adam Sandler anywhere near this project. One of the running jokes throughout is that Kevin James' President of the United States can't actually read. We were expected to laugh yet nobody did. Ugh.
3) Unfinished Business
Just look at the poster above. There is nothing that will make you want to watch this film and believe me, having seen Unfinished Business, it's well worth avoiding. None of the scenes feel like they should follow the other and some sensitive subjects, such as bullying, are sidelined for crude jokes, all of which leave a lot to be desired.
2) Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2
I hate it when unfunny comedies get sequels. I hate it more when the sequel is actually less funny than the first film. That's the case with Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2, a film that I hate with a passion. It's bad enough that the base of all the jokes come from the fact that Paul Blart is fat but to let Kevin James play the lead is just a cardinal sin. When is someone of importance going to tell this man that he is just not funny?
1) The Ridiculous 6
Now, I went into The Ridiculous 6 with low expectations. Two hours later that really felt more like three, those low expectations were well and truly met. The first film of Adam Sandler's four film deal with Netflix really doesn't even try to be anything but a load of offensive jokes told by Sandler and his motley crew of unfunny friends who really do steal a living as comedic actors. Go on Netflix, do the right thing and tear up that contract!
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